“I felt clouded in my mind.”

I was at a point in my time during the COVID months where I really and truly wanted to commit suicide, hurt myself, do something. I felt really crummy. I felt clouded in my mind. I was working up all this stuff in my mind where I really didn’t need to but all of these thoughts just came to my mind. 

It is okay to have those feelings. Don’t give up no matter how far you want to go with that…hold on to that one thing that keeps you on your own two feet.  If it is a cat or a pet you have, or a niece or a nephew, you have to hold on to that and forget about everything else. If that is what keeps you moving and motivated, keep that.

Spread that positive word and give self-care to yourself by saying “I love myself” and “how cute I am” or something like that…which isn’t something we do very often but that helps with self-care so people can be who they want to be — being themselves rather than thinking they have to be someone else they are not. Don’t give up on yourself.

I have been practicing Buddhism for more than 5 years and I still do it — it reminds me of moderation. Be still and silent and still be happy doing things for others. You don’t always have to be in the video frame of a recording or of a video. It is about more of what you can give others rather than what you are giving to yourself.

If a person you are concerned about is in immediate danger of harming themselves and/or refuses to stay safe with you, call or text 911.

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1.800.273.8255

Or text “HOME” to the Crisis Text Line at 741741

Remember, if you are struggling, please know you are not alone.